Every judge's face is tight, but Karlie experiences a range of emotions that I haven't seen since Matthew McConaughey watched the video in Interstellar. And Tyler replies, “Not even to dinner with the Kushners?”ĪND ALL OF THE AIR WHOOSHES OUT OF THE ROOM LIKE A BOMB WENT OFF. “I cannot see Karlie wearing this anywhere," Brandon remarks. He later says he's going to remake it for himself and use it in his drag act (his persona, Kimberly Onassis, is a first lady, you'll recall). So, things don't look good for Tyler and he knows it, but he's proud of the look. It's a conservative look that would better work on a job interview at Fox News than a fashion party in Paris. The judges hate it and for good reason, I suppose. Louis and Jackie O was 5'7" so what's the story here, hon? I could psychoanalyze this misstep for days but suffice it to say: His first inclination is to do a sailor-y Reno Sweeney-style wide pant but then at the last minute he crafts a dark pencil skirt and a white, high-collared sleeveless blouse with a tuxedo ruffle. He keeps bringing up First Ladies, Jackie O, and Kennebunkport. I think it's fair to say that Tyler just gets lost in the sauce with this one. We're talking fashion on fashion cutting edge stuff. So, to review: The assignment was to make something cool and chic for Karlie Kloss to wear to a CFDA event in Paris. I'm still shaking, but it may just be the chill from my shoulder cutouts. You're not going to get the fabric you need ripping the stitches out of a Little League t-shirt. This is especially important for someone like Kloss who is very tall, has long legs, and doesn't want to wear anything too short. The key is the yardage that bottoms offer. I hadn't thought of this going in but (I know this will shock you) I am not a fashion designer. The designers skip Mood and go ham on a Goodwill at which almost everyone buys stacks of jeans, pants, and skirts. The challenge is to make a chic, fun upcycled look for Karlie herself, which she'll rock at a CFDA event in Paris. Right up until the moment that I am not talking about yet, I had been fully prepared to pull out my big book of double entendres and tell you this week was all about the bottoms. Oh Godddd! I will never recover from this thing that did not happen to me and affects me in no way, shape, or form. Oh, God! Oh, Goddddddd! There is a moment near the end of the fourth episode of Project Runway that is so cringe-inducing, so weirdly shocking, and so awkward that I am still beset by paroxysms of secondhand embarrassment so strong that I can hardly catch my breath.
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